So, it's Sunday morning, and I am helping with the Chalice during Communion. I'm wiping off the rim and, unbeknownst to the curate, a 2 year old at the altar rail reaches out and grabs the bottom rim of said chalice.
In a slow motion splash reminiscent of the D-Day scene in Saving Private Ryan, two of the eternal Sunday mysteries were answered:
Who knew albs could absorb that much wine?
Who knew Gospel Books in the Processional could be used to hide such wine spillage on said altar vestments?
According to Canon law, I have to consume the alb or set myself on fire. Good luck filing that Workman's Comp claim.