Wednesday, July 02, 2008

SPAM Evolution

I have to give points for originality in this e-mail spam message I just got. The dear-old-Nigerian-widow-who-needs-to-put-money-in-your-bank-account-because-her-husband-was-killed-in-a-plane-crash SPAM dodge is no longer enough. I found this particular gem waiting on me in my inbox (my peanut gallery comments after each paragraph):

Attention ....

Greetings to you! I am Colonel Isah Ali...a Uganda Army Officer in Darfur Sudan under African Union Peace Keeping Force.As you may Know,there are several cases of insurgents attacks and bombing going on here.However We managed to move funds belonging to some deceased persons who were attacked and killed through insurgent attacks.The total amount is US$15 Million dollars in cash.

(Ugandans in Sudan...sketchy, but I will refrain from comment. I love the bit about the moving of funds from deceased persons. While I am not an international legal expert, I believe that's called looting.)

We want to move this money to you so that you may keep our share for us until when we shall come over to meet You. We will take 70%, my partner and I while you take 30%.No strings attached.Just help us move it out of Sudan as Sudan we all know is a war zone.

(No Strings Attached...right. Banks with electronic transfer capability don't general tend to exist in war zones. And just what I want, war looters coming over to meet me. Please check your Uzi at the door.)

Note that We plan to use the British Diplomatic courier in shipping the money out in two large metallic Boxes,using diplomatic immunity.If you are interested I will send you the full details. My job is to find a good partner that we can trust and that will assist us. Can I trust you? When you receive this letter, kindly send me an e-mail signifying your interest including your most confidential telephone/fax numbers for quick communication and also your contact details. This business is risk free. Get back to me immediately for more directives.

(British Diplomatic courier...we're up to international fraud. And if you are the peacekeeping force, you would not need diplomatic immunity. And I thought you said 15 million US dollars worth of Sudanese currency...that ain't never going to fit into 2 metal boxes.

(Details...details.)

(International thug looters who want to come visit me after a laundering money scheme. Risk free...riiiight. )

Respectfully,

Colonel Isah Ali

(With respect, I am amused on numerous levels,
-The Incredulously Rev. Archer)

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