I am just beginning the process of starting to look for another parish, as my curacy will be up in the next year. I was purusing the Church Deployment Office website last night on a lark which lists churches that are looking for clergy.
Each church gives a little blurb about itself, including its top 4 "Primary Goals of the Parish." Needless to say, this can be daunting for a parish to have to self-examine itself in this way. In a lot of ways, I find the process a lot like trying to sell a house or going on a date for the first time. You want to be honest, but not too honest, if you know what I mean. You don't want to completely scare off all your potential priests. So, there is a fine line between flat out lying about your parish and being too forthcoming. No parish is perfect, just as no parishioner or priest is perfect. That's just life in the church.
I came across a parish that shall remain nameless. I've been actively involved with the Episcopal Church for 10 years or more, and their primary goal for the parish was something I had never heard before, which is saying something given the Episcopal Church's penchant for jingles and pithy-if-somewhat-arrogant one-liners. (For instance, who can forget the classic "Jesus came to take away your sins, not your brain...")
In any event, the primary goal of this particular parish was as follows, "To foster a climate of aloha."
(I will refrain from making a crack about St. Magnum the P.I. Church by-the-sea, or some other church name that goes with said goal.)